BIGpumpin'

BIGpumpin'
And check "The Pump Party" Feature blog at 68caliber.com

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Our pumps are Harley Davidsons, metaphorically speaking.

So have you ever noticed how Harley riders (yes, generalizing again) don't particularly like Jap bikes? Yeah, me to... why do you suppose that is? Maybe it's cause the money spent on these "crotch rockets" goes over seas, and takes jobs from American workers. Yup, could be that, Hog riders are often patriotic types. But the hatred of "rice burners" and their associated "squiddy" riders is near pathological, it cant be just fervent pride of country, I have never seen . Could it be the seizure inducing bright colors that many "zoom-splat's" are painted up with? Since the colorful bikes may make the notoriously homophobic Harley huggers assume all "lane weavers" are as queer as three dollar bills? Maybe, but I don't think we have to go that far... the simple fact is, the "big twin" boys don't like how FAST these little bikes are. They are waaay faster than any v-twin short of a top fuel drag Harley... and those are probably so far from a real Harley its not funny.

BUT!... the Harley rider doesn't hate all other bikes, in fact they seem to have a soft spot for BMW's, not sure why. Could it be the whole German association? I mean, we all know most double thumper humpers are just a signed declaration away from being Nazis... they have that damn party sign up sheet somewhere... maybe out back in the meth lab! Oh, where was I, so yeah hogsters like Beemers, but they also like Italian bikes, I see Ducati's rolling with Milwaukee steel all the time... what gives? Oh yeah, Italy + Germany = Axis! ...Oh wait, the Japanese were in there to weren't they, oh well, there goes that idea.

Anyway the REAL point is, pumpers are the Panhead pilots of paintball... we like a little extra chrome crap gimmicked up on our "rides", we run in groups with matching patches & cool nicknames stenciled on our backs, we spend way too much on gear & say "well, look at the craftsmanship, this is not some chinese built junk!!". We often wear fingerless gloves & some kind of head wrap, and NEVER wear helmets. Oh yeah, dont get me started on the tattoos & leather we both tend to sport! But the really real main connection is, pumpers & hogsters both sacrifice speed for quality & style. And another thing, much like the ricers that buzz by Harleys at times, we have to deal with super fast guns shooting past us... and we have a similar response to them. As fast as they are going, they have to run out of gas soon, and when they do, we will catch up to them & beat their asses... no, wait... shoot their asses, that's it.

disclaimer- the statements above are 100% nonsense & are in no way ment to provoke the anger of any Harley riders! Just jokes... bad, tasetless jokes.

-maldon007